Whatever

de-lurking in West Palm Beach...

No, giving hummers never occured to me as a way of defusing racial tension. Funniest thing I've read today so far and living in Florida I do in fact get exposed to some weird stuff!

Don't you see? He's providing healthcare benefits to the uninsured! :D Sorry. . .

Clearly this Allen fellow would benefit from a judicial application of force. You know, to knock some of the stupid out.

I spent my formative years in Florida and this knowledge was never passed on to me. Then again, my grandparents had moved to the state from NY in the '20's, so maybe the natives kept this lore secret from the Jew-Yankee interloper types.

Bizarre sexual behavior in Florida is not limited to white men. I understand they also have women who become teachers and then have sex with 12 year old boys.

Frankly I don't care if guys try to buy sex in public toilets (capitalism and consenting adults etc), I do object to such stupid excuses. Fer feck's sake he would have been better off just admitting he wanted man sex.

To quote one of my favorite X-Files episodes, "All the nuts roll downhill to Florida."

Hey remember our buddy Ted Haggard? He's the guy who bought meth from his gay prostititue, but later claimed: "I called him to buy some meth, but I threw it away".

That seems pretty reasonable to me.

Why just last week I bought a 42" plasma television from Best Buy, and when I got home - I threw it away.

I honestly don't understand Allen's Gas-on-the-Fire tactic in trying to save his reputation. But, it is damn fun to watch. Really, I know it's horrible of me, but I keep waiting around to see what the crazy bastard will say next.

Still, he'd do a lot to save his image if he just admitted that he likes to smoke a little pole now and then. After that, the healing can begin.

I think it's just Florida. The place just seems to breed a particular brand of blatant criminal weirdness (or weird criminality). Apparently all you need for a successful career as a writer of humorous hard-boiled crime novels is a stint at a Florida newspaper.

I had missed the part where the Officer ditched the chance to bust an actual violent thug in favor of a $20 solicitation charge.

The whole thing is a clusterf*ck of bigotry.

Every conservative is a repressed homosexual. If only our culture was not so sexually oppressive people like Rush Limbaugh and Newt Gingrich and George Bush and Dick Cheney could live as they wish they could and we wouldn't have the problems we do now. For the want of a knob job we got the Iraq war.

Well, if you weren't blocked at the Dayton Airport before this, you most likely will be now.

;)

Hey, this may be the next big political idea…reparations money AND blow jobs. Nice work Allen!

"Why just last week I bought a 42" plasma television from Best Buy, and when I got home - I threw it away."

Well, yeah, who'd want to be associated with Best Buy? I understand your shame.

Josh Jasper:

I'm not sure it's shown that the burglar they were hoping to catch out was violent, nor that he was in the act of burglarizing at the time. Also, I'm not entirely sure why police should ignore what they see as suspicious behavior simply because they are initially otherwise engaged. We can argue whether solicitation should be a crime, I suppose, but at the moment it is.

Ed:

"For the want of a knob job we got the Iraq war."

Eh. I don't think every conservative man is repressed and gay, and I think there was more to the Iraq war than a knob job.

Maybe he's going for an insanity defense.

Apparently all you need for a successful career as a writer of humorous hard-boiled crime novels is a stint at a Florida newspaper.

This story does read like something Dave Barry would write, doesn't it? Perhaps Allen is gathering fodder for his next career as a novelist.

Janice:

Don't forget Carl Hiaasen!

John,

You're right - Carl really is the king of weird Florida crime novels. I don't know why Dave's name came to mind first.

At least Allen didn't claim to solicit the officer after licking a toad!

I think that's why Fark has a special article tag, just for Florida.

Cambias: My favorite "weird crime in Florida" novel is Dave Barry's Big Trouble. It's one of the funniest things I've ever read. And I'm not alone:

"This book will do for [the South Florida] tourism industry what Dennis Rodman did for bridal wear." --Carl Hiaasen

There really has been a whole bunch of neat work in the "weird crime in Florida" genre, hasn't there?

All he needs do now is add a "PROTECT THE CHILDREN!" spin to it and it would be perfect.

Don't forget Tim Dorsey as well in the Florida journalist turned crime writer.

I think the female teacher/ male student case in Florida is more interesting.
http://www.floridatoday.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=2007708050342

Dave Weingart,

Allen is protecting the children - by soliciting grown-ups.

Rhiannon_s said it - Frankly I don't care if guys try to buy sex in public toilets (capitalism and consenting adults etc).

As long as he's not soliciting children, I don't give a good God Damn who the guy blows. Just quit being a pansy about it and own up.

Janiece:

"Just quit being a pansy about it and own up."

Ironic choice of words, there.

John,

Intentional, actually. Hee!

1. Until recently I didn't even know that Republicans had sex. I know Baptists (and aren't most of them Republican) in the South don't have sex. They're afraid it may lead to dancing.

2. Iraq wasn't about a knob job. Bombing Serbia was about a knob job.

"For generations, have the white men of Florida pulled aside their sons and passed along the secret knowledge that the best way to avoid racial conflict with a black man is to offer him pizza money and a hummer?"

I seriously just spat a mouthful of sandwich all over my keyboard here at work...and had to explain why to my co-workers, who all gave me the hairy eyeball.

Except my editor, who, for some reason, rather than asking me why I wasn't doing work, read the article and chuckled, as well.

Thanks, John.

I lived in Key West for a few years. One of my friends was a nurse and she told me a lot of stories about fine, upstanding, perfectly normal folk from salt-of-the-earth places like Ohio and Michigan that would end up in the Key West emergency room for pool balls stuck in their orifices and the like.

It just goes to show that there must be something in the water, air, or both in Florida.

If nothing else, I am now determined to own a copy of some kind of "weird Florida crime" mystery novel. I can't pass up a novel length version of anything like this article.

Dave Barry doubtless came to mind because working at a newspaper was mentioned.

Also, didn't the two collaborate on something big? Maybe I'm just confabulating that because they ought'to've.

Damn, Dave Klecha beat me to the Fark point.

Andrew:

Actually, I beat both of you to the Fark point; it's in the actual entry.

Don't Dave Barry and Carl Hiaasen belong to a rock group? I mean for real--with Stephen King and some other writers.

Alice B.-

The Rockbottom Remainders

Yes, they do.

"The Rockbottom Remainders" is a pretty sad name for a rock band with Dave Barry in it, though. It's certainly no Federal Duck.

Amy Tan sings (or at least used to) with them.

I am sure that 28% ( the crazies who support such people ) will believe Allen.

So, basically what he's saying is "I'm not gay, I'm a racist"? That's quite a defence.

I look forward to a day in this country when a man tries to get out of seeming a racist by trying to say he's gay. That would be progress.

Perhaps my hypothetical-children-I-don't-have yet will live to see it.

Hahahaha!

Sorry, I just can't stop laughing at how stupid this guy is. It's tragic that he thinks his defense would be in any way logical, but more funny than anything else.

Megan : So, basically what he's saying is "I'm not gay, I'm a racist"? That's quite a defence., in conservative circles, that probably makes you less hated.

John : Also, I'm not entirely sure why police should ignore what they see as suspicious behavior simply because they are initially otherwise engaged. We can argue whether solicitation should be a crime, I suppose, but at the moment it is.

Having read the conversation reported between the guy and the cop, the cop was clearly trying to set him up for a bust. He could have just told the guy "no thanks." and gone on with his bust.

I don't trust cops who bust people for cruising to lack homophobia. Even for-pay cruising. I don't trust the departmensts who push for the busts either. You may feel they deserve the benefit of the doubt. Enough years of GLBT activism provided me with sufficient reason to be distrusting.

Josh Jasper:

"Having read the conversation reported between the guy and the cop, the cop was clearly trying to set him up for a bust."

Well, yes, clearly, and Allen helped him considerably in that goal, I'd say. As for telling Allen "no thanks," when he was being propositioned, are you suggesting that a policeman should ignore someone walking right up to him and breaking the law? Again, one may argue whether the law is fair or unfair, useful or not, but I'm not sure I'd agree with the proposition that police should selectively enforce laws, or not pursue, in a legal fashion, those they believe are breaking laws (or are about to).

"I don't trust cops who bust people for cruising to lack homophobia. Even for-pay cruising. I don't trust the departments who push for the busts either."

It's not in evidence from the article that the department was pushing for this particular bust; it appears to have just fallen into the officer's lap, as it were. I agree it's entirely possible the officer may be homophobic, but it's also entirely possible he's not, and he was just doing his job.

Word, Megan. Some people will kill you if not killing you might make them look gay (remember that crush show on that tabloid talk show
http://www.glaad.org/action/al_archive_detail.php?id=2272). Right now in our culture many people would rather be seen as a murderer rather than as gay.

"Megan : So, basically what he's saying is "I'm not gay, I'm a racist"? That's quite a defence., in conservative circles, that probably makes you less hated."

Go out and try to meet some conservatives my friend, your prejudices are showing.

Ed,

I'm afraid I have to agree with Scalzi on this one - clearly this knucklehead is both, and is trying to obfuscate his gay activities with the blatent racist defense. Perhaps he believes his constituents and the larger public are dumber than a box of rocks...or he is.

In either case, the fact that he's demonstrated himself to be a racist doesn't negate his attempt to participate in what is clearly a gay sexual activity. He really needed to just quit digging.

Oh – Thank you! I had not heard this story before. I am sitting here laughing so hard!! I was born and raised in Jacksonville Florida (I live in New Mexico now) and my family was chocked full of Florida politicians. Now Bob Allen has gone and done it….let out one of our Florida secrets! One of the best ways to make friends and influence people is to hang around park restrooms and give out a couple of sawbucks and a BJ. You just have to understand what the heat, bugs, tourist attractions, swamps, grits, gators, New Yorkers, and hurricanes – do to our formative years – Y’all. Ain’t none of us quite right. Many of my friends of color would agree that the politicians in Florida have been giving them BJs for years. Look further into some voting problems and practices that have occurred in many mostly black Florida communities. Those good old boys sure now how to get things done…Y’all. Wow – the more I think about this story the more amazed I am…
Y’all take care ya’hear,
Patricia

Ed: Every conservative is a repressed homosexual.

Ed, everyone who is politically left of center is just repressed. Deal with it.

Wait a sec - you mean they *don't* pleasure each other and exchange money in public restrooms in other states?

Y'all don't know what you're missing! Now you know why Orlando is the happiest place on earth!

not just an asshat, but a *cheap* one at that.

I have to say that while I'm pretty live and let live, I can see that being a real public health issue. Though maybe someone can explain this to me - If progressives don't care about who does what b/t consenting adults, why would any of you care if all conservatives were repressed homosexuals? And yes, I do know that many of you on this blog don't stand behind the comment. And yes, I am enjoying watching the train wreck. Watching stupid go plaid is always fun. Personally, I'm of the clean your own house first school, so let's get this a**hat out of the way.

Umm. Not that I am defending the guy. But according to most of the local news reports the conversation went along the lines of

Cop: " Been here often."
Allen: " Uh ocassionally."
Cop: " Want a blowjob? 20 bucks."
Allen: " uh, maybe."

Most of the local news reports said that the cop propositioned Allen. Sound to me ( a professional skeptic) that there may be a couple of different crimes/ethical shortcomings on both sides here. Would be interesting to have had a real recording of what happened.

Mike:

"Most of the local news reports said that the cop propositioned Allen."

The policeman's report (as reported in the Sentinel) notes that Allen peered over the top of the bathroom stall the cop was in -- twice -- and then entered the stall with the cop still in it. At which point I suspect it was pretty clear what Allen was there for, unless in Florida, men regularly enter occupied public restroom stalls just to chat.

But by all means, let Allen suggest there was police entrapment; I'd be interested to know how that plays out.

Here's the actual police report, incidentally (.pdf link). It looks like the cop figured out pretty quickly what Allen was up, and made it easy for him to get himself in trouble.

John: Well, yes, clearly, and Allen helped him considerably in that goal, I'd say. As for telling Allen "no thanks," when he was being propositioned, are you suggesting that a policeman should ignore someone walking right up to him and breaking the law? Again, one may argue whether the law is fair or unfair, useful or not, but I'm not sure I'd agree with the proposition that police should selectively enforce laws,

Well, shoot, they selectively enforce speeding laws, littering laws, and so on. If a cop pulls you over for speeding, you can be "let go with a warning". *How* is this all that different? Cops in vice constantly know where prostitutes hang out. Again, many professional prostitutes keep fairly safe. If the cop had said "no thinks, I'm not gay" to the first time the representative propositioned him we would not be having this conversation. But he decided to see if he could wrangle busting a gay man instead of actually tracking down a burglar. The job he was *assigned* to do.

I'm sorry if you're not seeing the homophobic agenda there. If you're not, I'm pretty sure it's because you don't have experience in how homophobic cops operate. It's clear as daylight to me.

Oh, I saw that in an "Extras" episode with Ricky Gervais and that other tall dude and a strange old man. Except that they were all actors taking a break during Baftas. But they were just chatting really, so maybe Mr. Allen is a fan.

Barry and Hiassen worked on a round robin group novel called Naked Came the Manatee together (other authors included Edna Buchanan and Elmore Leonard). I honestly didn't think it was as good as Hiassen's solo work, but it had some good stretches.

Um. I'm not completely comfortable with the cop's story (he was inside an unlocked stall drying his hands?), but as reported Allen's behavior was perhaps a bit more aggressive than I'd want a stranger to be with me in a public restroom.

That said, I think his excuse is the stupidest base-stroking thing I've heard in ages, and he'd best hope very, very hard that he isn't sentenced to a Florida prison.

Allen went on to say he was afraid of becoming a "statistic."

Well, he's done that! He's not a statistic now, he's an anecdote.

Josh Jasper:

"But he decided to see if he could wrangle busting a gay man instead of actually tracking down a burglar. The job he was *assigned* to do."

I think you're cutting that hair a little fine, there. The job a cop is assigned to do is to be a cop. If in doing one aspect of his job he sees someone doing something that engages another aspect of his job, I'm not seeing why he can't or shouldn't pursue that.

Now, as it happens, in the police officer's report suggests that the reason the cop twigged to Allen in the first place was because he saw Allen's car circle around a couple of times and was concerned that he was being counter-surveilled. So, in fact, Allen came to the cop's attention at least initially because, as you say, he was doing the job he was assigned to do.

"I'm sorry if you're not seeing the homophobic agenda there."

I can see why you see it there. I'm seeing the "Let's keep people from soliciting for prostitution in a public restroom" agenda, primarily.

"You wouldn't hit a guy with a c*?k in his mouth, would ya?" - Jon Stewart

Classic.

Jon R wrote:
Hey, this may be the next big political idea…reparations money AND blow jobs. Nice work Allen!

Okay, you win the thread.

I just like the idea of "40 Acres and some head."

I'm seeing the "Let's keep people from soliciting for prostitution in a public restroom" agenda, primarily.

That sounds rather like the quip about how the law prohibits the rich and the poor alike from sleeping under bridges.

This non-homophobic cop was obviously being very steadfast about prohibiting men AND women from prostituting themselves in a men's restroom.

Carl Hiassen and Dave Barry are very funny writers, but I always have the feeling that they have an unfair advantage. I mean, they live in a state that is apparently to weirdness what Kuwait is to crude oil - they're kneedeep in the weird every day. Show me a comic crime writer who lives somewhere resolutely normal, like Illinois, and you'll have found a true comic genius.

Dave Barry, Dave Marsh, Grail Marcus, Stephen King, Amy Tan, Barbara Kingsolver, Matt Groening, and tons of other people I don't remember set up this rock band, The Rockbottom Remainders, proceedings to go to charity (American Literacy Association, I think). They were indeed pretty terrible to start with, apart from Barbara Kingsolver who apparently could play. One of their famous acts was Amy Tan singing These Boots Are Made from Walking on dominatrix outfit, trampling all over Dave Barry (or maybe it was Dave Marsh?) and extinguishing a cigarette on his chest. Dave Berry, Dave Marsh and Greil Marcus featured as the Critics' Chorus.

I know this because I translated a book they published called "The Rock Bottom Remainders tour America", which was (not surprisingly, seen who the contributors where) very good and whose Italian edition somehow never materialized, to my great regret.

Nicole J. LeBouef-Little:

"That sounds rather like the quip about how the law prohibits the rich and the poor alike from sleeping under bridges."

Oh, please. Unlike the homeless person who has not much choice but to sleep under a bridge, Bob Allen was not forced either to solicit for prostitution or do such a solicitation in a park bathroom by anything other than his own choice. Lots of gay folk -- even the closeted ones -- manage to get their rocks off without doing either.

I don't think anyone who has spent any time on this site could reasonably peg me for someone against men having sex with men, if that's what they want. I say, go! Sex away. However, if you choose to express that desire by cruising public men's rooms and offering cash for services to be rendered to the men there, you run the risk of, oh, being arrested for solicitation of prostitution.

"This non-homophobic cop was obviously being very steadfast about prohibiting men AND women from prostituting themselves in a men's restroom."

In this particular case, he did neither; in this particular case he was steadfast against people soliciting for prostitutes in a men's restroom. And clearly, it's men who are more likely to do that there.

Now, we can speculate as to what the policeman in this story would have done if he'd seen a woman doing what Allen was doing; personally I would suspect that if he saw a woman entering a men's restroom, he might reasonably wonder what she was up to and investigate, because, as you wish to suggest, it would be unusual.

As noted, I will grant the possibility of this cop being a homophobe; hey, he might be. What I don't grant is that he must be a homophobe in order to have arrested Allen soliciting for prostitution in a public men's room. He just had to be paying attention.

Why is it that everyone soliciting sex in a men's room who's not George Michael turns out to be a Republican?

We had a rash of 'em in our part of Ohio a few years ago. They always make me sad. I'm just like, "Dude, if you want some hot man action, go getcha some! Be happy!"

Show me a comic crime writer who lives somewhere resolutely normal, like Illinois, and you'll have found a true comic genius.

You mean Chicago politics are normal?

Though you may have a point, ajay, since Second City does come from Chicago, I wouldn't choose Illinois as my example of normalcy. Wasn't there a study that tried to find the most "average" town in the U.S. and landed somewhere in Ohio?

Does that mean I get to be the next big comic crime writer, Alice? 'Cause that'd be all right. Today I'm working on a murder mystery set in a thinly disguised Yellow Springs . . .

I have often said that somebody needs to do for the rust belt Midwest what Faulkner did for the antebellum South. Maybe now I should amend that to what Hiaasen did for Florida . . .

Oops, post bellum. I'm not well today.

Angelle, have you ever read The Watsons Go to Birmingham by Christopher Paul Curtis? Yeah, it's a children's book, but it has, hands down, the funniest first chapter I've read in any book, ever. And the beginning, at least, is set in the rust belt.

But a funny crime novel from up there is needed, for sure.

And ajay, it just dawns on me that since John is in "normal" Ohio, and this has got to be one of the funniest posts I've read in ages, he must be the comic genius you're looking for. (Take a bow, John.)

One of the things I noticed yesterday is not every newspaper article is mentioning Allen's excuse of the black men scared me. Several of the newspapers (which I don't have links to right now, sorry) just say "undercover officer" and that Allen was intimidated.

Allen could have said something like, "I was in the park for X reason, I went into the restroom and a man propositioned me and I became intimidated and agreed to whatever he said so I could get out of the situation." That's somewhat more plausible than his justificaion of what -- he saw black men in the park, got scared, went into the restroom stall where another black man was?

Please.

What John (if I may call you John) said at 8:36. THe homophobia people should be concerned with, and what's driving this and many another similar story (cough)

The newly-elected president of the Young Republican National Federation, Glenn Murphy, has stepped down as the group’s president less than a month after being elected to the post at the group’s convention in Florida last month….
n a shocking police report filed by the Clark Co. Sheriff’s office, Murphy is accused of sexually assaulting another man on July 29, 2007, while he lay sleeping in his bed. The alleged assault of the 22-year-old man took place in the Jeffersonville, Indiana home of his sister following a Young Republican party in which both Murphy and the 22-year-old man had been in attendance.

is that they're perpetrated by high-ranking members of a political party that's made considerable political hay out of gay-hating. Had this been a Democrat, Fox News and the right blogosphere would be abuzz with how this shows the left to be the anti-values, anti-family party, and you could bet it would show up during that Democrat's next election campaign.
Re our pal Glen Murphy,
"Murphy, who also serves as chairman of the Clark Co. Republicans, has been viewed as a rising star in the Indiana and national GOP. His consulting firm has advised congressional candidates like that of former U.S. Rep. Mike Sodrel (R). He is fond of using divisive wedge issues, such as gay marriage, to promote his candidates..."

He now is claiming that the blowjob was consensual. And too, too funny, before someone beats me to it,
"...the quote Murphy gave the Jeffersonville News and Tribune after his election last month: “I will essentially be the mouthpiece and effective leader for the tens of thousands of Young Republicans, 18 to 40, across the country.”
I can see him nudging that dude awake, "You hot hunka man-meat, want me for your, er, 'mouthpiece?"

So what sort of excuse do you think we'll hear from the (ex) chairman of the Young Republican National Federation? "I was afraid of becoming a statistic, so I blew him before he could wake up?"

Man, Young Republicans suck.

I've been a Hiaasen fan since 1996, long before I had any idea I'd one day move from New Hampshire to the Fort Lauderdale/Boca Raton area, where I lived from August 2004 through March 2006 before furloughing myself. Whereas previously I had assumed that Hiaasen had exaggerated local goings-onfor effect, I quickly came to understand that if anything he'd toned reality down so it could be suitably credible to those not familiar with Florida's insane coterie of crooks, shady politicians, assawful drivers, oblivious fossil-people, dumbass tourists, and basic rednecks, all of whom peacefully coexist in an unspoken destroy-the-environment coalition.

Anyone bored enough to read the rants of a frustrated distance runner dealing with the human circus, hurricanes, and general friggery of the place might check out "The Floridiocy Files" (links below).

Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV
Part V
Part VI
Part VII

John I can see why you see it [a homophobic agenda] there.

Then you have no sense of history for how cops have historically treated gay men.

I'm seeing the "Let's keep people from soliciting for prostitution in a public restroom" agenda, primarily.

Seriously, this is because, as a straight man, you have no knowledge of how cops single out gay men. You can educate yourself by looking into the issue, but don't pretend it's nothing different.

John, there's a history of cops busting gay men for cruising. There used to be sting operations set out, not to long ago, when being gay was a crime. Police still go out and bust on gay people for "public lewdness" and ignore straight people doing the same damn thing.

Yeah, there's a chance the guy wasn't motivated by any of the vast, documented history of bigotry from the police to to queer people. Also, it's possible that other minority groups targeted by the police aren't targeted just because of bigotry. Please feel free to suggest that the next time race and crime gets tossed around.

Josh Jasper:

"Then you have no sense of history for how cops have historically treated gay men."

I have no sense of history because I can see how you see a homophobic agenda? You're really losing me here, Josh, because I'm agreeing with you that it's a perfectly valid view. I don't imagine we have particularly divergent views about the historical relationship between gays and police, or whether homophobia exists in law enforcement; where we appear to differ is in whether it was a driving issue in this particular case.

Personally, however, I also think it's clear Bob Allen is a racist piece of self-loathing shit, and so I'm wallowing in the schadenfreudtastic spectacle of a hypocritical anti-gay politician getting whacked impressively hard about the head by the irony stick. I have no doubt given what I've learned about his legislative agenda that Bob Allen is the sort of fellow who would enthusiastically and publicly support vice raids on city park men's rooms because it's a way to round up those dirty, delicious gay men, so, really, that makes this even better.

Feel bad for Bob Allen if you like, Josh. I'm really not going to.

I look forward to hearing about an episode in a theater full of black men, when he was worried about being victimized by a dissatisfied filmgoer, so offered him a 'happy ending'.

John, you're conflating feeling bad for Bob Allen with being extremely dubious of the cop's motives. Do I have 100% proof? no. but the way it was described in the PDF you liked to fits the stock pattern for cruising busts. It's not like they're uncommon. Cop waits in known cruising area, gay man propositions him (for money or not), cop makes bust. This is sort of a known thing in the gay community.

Apparently, you think that, if I say the cop was probably looking to but a gay man because of homophobia, I feel bad for Allen.

I don't. I could care less about the man. But honestly, if Larry Elder was given racist treatment, I wouldn't try and explain away what the person treating him badly did. I'd suspect racism even though Elder is a sellout.

The problem does not cease to be a problem just because it happens to someone who I think is scum. In some ways, it helps highlight the issue.

Josh Jasper:

"Apparently, you think that, if I say the cop was probably looking to but a gay man because of homophobia, I feel bad for Allen."

No, I thought you actually felt bad for Allen. Sorry for the misread.

Sorry if I wasn't clear.

Allen may well have contributed to the climate that brought him down, having *sponsored* anti cruising laws.

Allen may well have contributed to the climate that brought him down, having *sponsored* anti cruising laws.

That irony stick just keeps getting bigger and bigger. What a shame.

Man, this guy wasn't even trying.

"What I said was, 'I'll give you twenty bucks to PARK my Hummer!'"

He will have the come to Jesus experience and get re-elected in a landslide. A real Florida moment.

As an average Floridian, who is occasionally dim, all I can say is that I'm not THAT dim.

Dude's seriously underestimating his constituents.

That's truly awesome, John.

And while I'm concerned about police homophobia-- if it existed in this case, it has now resulted in the high-profile humiliation of a prominent homophobe, who will now almost certainly lose his job as a result, and may well be replaced by someone more equal-rights-friendly, thus advancing the agenda of people in favor of equal rights everywhere.

On another note, one of the best things about "Naked came the Manatee" is that Carl Hiassen had the unenviable task of writing the last chapter; one can almost sense his extreme frustration at having to tie all the nearly nonsensical plot points together. You can almost hear him screaming… "Jesus Christ, Dave, Elmore, Edna! This doesn't make any $%&^$*&% sense!"

Of course this shouldn't be a matter for law enforcement. If solicitation is prohibited in bathrooms then what's that condom/breath mint machine doing there?

I'm not having any trouble seeing that cops have a history of being homophobia. I am seeing how wanting to rout out cruising from public restrooms automatically makes one homophobic. It strikes me that one ought to be able to use a public restroom for its intended purpose without having others look in, walk in, or proposition them. I can revile homophobia without wanting to defend the use of park restrooms for soliciting.

Then again, one also doesn't normally dry ones hands in a stall, so I won't speculate on the purity of the cop's motives in this particular case.

Can I just say that Mr. Allen must be pretty lousy at BJs if he has to pay to give them out?
Being queer and female, I don't have a lot of experience with BJs, but he must be truly repulsive and awful to have to pay to GIVE one, right? I mean isn't that like paying someone to let you give them free ice cream?

Hehehe.

In any case, I know that everytime I have been completely surrounded by hot lesbians in a park and have been forced to offer my sexual favors to one of them in order to preserve my own safety, I didn't PAY them.

:-P

Allen is a putz. But I am confused here. Hmm the cop was on a stakeout in a toilet stall for a burglar?? What was being burgled?? Toilet seats? Good thing the cop got there before the burglar or he would've had nothing to go on!! LOL
Explain to me how you run a stakeout from a toilet stall?